How to feel more confident: The short version. Most confidence is based on, or should be based on, what’s inside. The self-worth that you understand and project about yourself should be based on your life’s experiences, feelings, and the built-up foundation of awesome you have inside. Now, if the feedback you’re looking to judge and to evaluate your self-worth comes from an external locus of focus, locus of control or information, than you’re constantly going to be wondering, “What does this person think about me?” “What does it mean if I do this?” “What if I don’t do this and people already expect me to do this?”–blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
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I understand that it is very important to take the feedback from others and to evaluate it on a case-by-case basis and see how it is important for your life. But that doesn’t mean a majority of what you experience or hear or get back from other people is worthwhile. As a matter of fact, I’d say the opposite. I’d say that probably no more than a few percentage points of the bits of the information you receive all day is useful to your life at all.
You’re bombarded with somewhere around the order of 2 billion pieces of information every single day, and at any given time your brain can only consciously focus on somewhere between 5 to 9 pieces of it. Think about that a little bit. You’re filtering all day long, every day. You can’t actively keep track of all the information that’s coming in on purpose. You’re not supposed to. You’re supposed to take in the most important things.
If you’re about to hit a car in front of you, that’s the most important thing right now – not the bill you have to pay. You’re sitting at your desk with your checkbook in front of you and a bill up on your screen, that’s the most important – not your car. Your self-confidence will be based on your belief system and your identity. Building up that foundation of knowing that you’re here for a purpose of improving the world no matter how close or small your reach.
What other people and other systems out there say about you, does not determine your worth. Understand that, with time and practice, and self-confidence goes up dramatically. That’s the short version. You have to read a textbook to find out more. Or just keep watching some videos here. Have a good one, thanks for watching, and peace out.