Photo by: Robert S. Donovan
Change can be a scary beast. It is, by definition, not what you’re used to. It takes you out of your comfort zone, throws you on the tracks, and doesn’t tell you when the next train is coming. You are on your own – champion of your world.
Does that scare you or energize you? I hope to help you be energized even more than you already are.
There are 3 very important tools for self-improvement that you need to master before going any further on your personal-development journey. You’ve got to know you are allowed, be more proactive, and to take more responsibility for your actions.
1. Give Yourself Permission to Change
It might be hard to wrap your head around this, but I have a little secret. More often than not, you are waiting for someone to give you permission to do something. What something? That something that will make your life better.
But who is this person that will grant such awesome permission to you? Do you file a request with your county officials? Does your 4th grade art teacher need to write you a letter?
You do not need anyone’s permission to change your life for the better. It’s probably hard to believe this is an issue. If that’s the case, then just take my word for it. Believing it’s true is irrelevant here.
What is relevant is that you use this time, right now, to give yourself permission to change. You don’t get off the hook that easily. Say it with me – this is very important.
“I give myself permission to change.”
“I now have permission to grow.”
“My growth journey has been approved.”
Feel better? Just in case, I give you permission to change, too. There. Now you’ve taken the first step to change and grow. Congratulations!
2. Choose to Make a Move Instead of Waiting or Reacting
A lot of times you can be held back by waiting around for the right time. Or maybe the right event to happen. Some external factor that will run across your path somehow.
Does your body wait for it to be sunny outside to take a breath? No. It does what it needs to do to sustain life. It was designed that way. It has an absolute necessity to keep on breathing no matter what. It’ll even hurl a nice, tasty treat out of your throat if it thinks you chose the wrong direction for it.
Think about that for a minute. You could benefit from heeding the wisdom of the respiratory system. Aim to always be proactive, adaptable, and flexible. If you wait for someone else to deliver oxygen to you… well, your journey might leave you short of breath.
3. Take Responsibility – Stop Blaming Others
You’ve heard it before. “When you point at someone, you have 3 fingers pointing back at you.” Did you ever stop to really think about that for a minute?
Is the problem you perceive really someone else’s fault? *Completely* their fault? If you weren’t in the picture at all, would everything still have worked out the same?
I am not blaming you and I don’t want you to blame yourself. Being responsible for your actions is not the same as the negativity born of blame. This isn’t the point of accepting responsibility for your actions. The point is to have a stake in the game. If you are detached from all that happens in the world, then you only receive a fraction of the opportunities to learn in life.
If you tend to dodge and point to other folks when something bad happens, I suggest seeing if there are any fingers pointing back at you. Write down possible lessons you can gain from these situations. Regardless of who is actually at fault.
Don’t look at these situations as opportunities to place blame. Look at them as a chance to advance. Be an investigator – always looking for useful clues. Blame quickly becomes irrelevant.
Growing for Change Makes Sense
You’re empowered and approved to charge off up and through your personal growth journey now. You know you need to take steps instead of waiting for things to dodge. And hey, it really would help to start accepting a bit more credit for the things that happen in your life.
Own up to life, learn from the curve-balls it throws you, and you’ll be batting your best in short order.