I know this is probably not the greatest analogy, but if you’ve had a car for more than 5 years, you know all the little details and secret tips about driving and working with your car. You know that the third gear is a little sticky. You know you have to jimmy with the knob on the radio just a little bit to get it going.
With age comes a beautiful marriage. And a nice kitchen apparently!
You know that no matter what, that car’s always going to get you where you need to go with minimal effort and maintenance. You know all these little things about it. And you absolutely would prefer to use that vehicle and be with that vehicle, than any other out there.
Ok I’m done with that analogy. It’s not even close. But you get what I’m trying to say here is that, if you take a guiding principle on how to have a happy marriage, and incorporate it into your life, you’ll be a much higher level of familiarity and love and partnership with the person that you’ve committed your life to.
Here are four principles to help you realize infinite growth potential so you can go for it all, and have a great marriage.
1) Effective Communication With Your Partner
You know what they say, the first one to yell loses. It’s true. I know it’s really tough, and I still have trouble with it today. But I am so much better than I used to be. If at any time, a conversation turns into a who can yell louder match, then you need to reset. You need to stop where you’re at, recalibrate, and come up with a new method of communicating.
Maybe it won’t happen that day, and there are a couple meetings that need to happen after that so you can work out a system, but working on communication is one of the biggest things you can do. Every word to you means something different to everyone else in the world. Think about this when you’re trying to explain something to your spouse. Because chances are, what you’re saying is not what’s being heard. Marinate on that, big time.
2) Share Everything As What Is Yours, Is Also Theirs
I know you really enjoy your caramel chocolate candies. And you really enjoy that special space in the garage that’s just for you. I get it, I understand it. But guess what: this is somebody that you completely and utterly love. Marriage until death.
So you really need to be able to share everything that you do and have with this person. Sure, we all need our own space. But there are times where we have to compromise, and really let the other person know that yes, you have a very important part in my life, and this is a reasonable request. Be willing to cooperate.
3) If A Problem Occurs, Don’t Point Fingers
People really to begin to understand that problems are problems, and they don’t do any type of good being blamed on people. Especially inside a relationship. You have to accept responsibility for any type of mistake, and then commit to doing better and working towards learning from the experience.
If all that’s happening is blaming and saving up these bad emotions for a rainy day, you’re not going to have fun. Work on finding at least one thing you can learn from each of these events to make the next one go smoother.
4) Make A Date Night To Spice Up Your Love Life
Maybe you don’t believe it, or remember what it’s even like, but you have to set up at least one day a month to take your spouse out on a date. Now you may have 18 kids and I understand that, so you might have to pay for a babysitter for a couple hours. I’m not talking about an entire day.
If it’s just going to a dinner and a movie or maybe a walk around a park, that’s absolutely perfect. Get time where you can talk to each other, adult to adult, loving heart to loving heart, and build that relationship, at least one date night at a time. It’s a wonderful experience to bring you back to that initial fiery love you had.
A Happy Marriage Is In Your Hands
You really can have a happy marriage if you follow the guiding principles we just talked about. It takes some work, it takes a lot of patience, but every bit of it is worth it. Work on effective communication. Share everything. Don’t point fingers, and make that date night really count in your relationship. It’s time to take back marriage from the craziness that’s happening in this world, and start being more awesome towards each other.